Tara Bryne, LSCW: How Approaching Intimate Partner Violence Through The Concept Of Self-Abandonment Can Identify Abuse And Promote Recovery
Tara Bryne, LCSW
As a therapist specializing in intimate partner violence (IPV), I want to take a moment to shed light on a subtle yet profound way IPV inflicts trauma—and how healing is possible.
What is Intimate Partner Violence?
Intimate partner violence is a pattern of abuse or coercion within a relationship where one partner seeks power and control over the other. IPV can take many forms, including:
Psychological & Emotional Abuse – Manipulation, gaslighting, or verbal degradation.
Physical Abuse – Any form of physical harm or intimidation.
Financial Abuse – Controlling finances, limiting access to money, or sabotaging employment.
Sexual Abuse & Coercion – Unwanted sexual contact, pressure, or reproductive control.
Spiritual Abuse – Using religious beliefs to control or guilt a partner.
Digital Abuse – Cyberstalking, controlling online interactions, or monitoring devices.
The effects of IPV are far-reaching and can manifest as anxiety, depression, and post-traumatic stress. However, one of the most overlooked impacts is the loss of connection with oneself.
The Trauma of Self-Abandonment
One of the most damaging effects of IPV is how it erodes a survivor’s relationship with themselves. Philosopher Søren Kierkegaard once wrote,
"The greatest hazard of all, losing one's self, can occur very quietly in the world, as if it were nothing at all.”
When someone is forced to consistently prioritize their partner’s needs over their own, they may slowly lose their sense of identity. This form of trauma—self-abandonment—can leave a person feeling lost, disconnected, and unsure of who they are outside the relationship.
Finding Your Way Back to Yourself
Healing from IPV is possible. If you feel disconnected from yourself, I encourage you to explore why with a mental health professional. Even if you can't quite pinpoint what feels off—maybe your gut tells you something isn’t right, or you feel deeply confused in your relationship—these can be subtle signs of IPV.
Your feelings are valid. Your experiences matter. And most importantly, you deserve to reconnect with yourSELF.
If this resonates with you, consider reaching out to a professional who can help you process and heal. You are not alone in this journey.
Take the First Step Toward Reclaiming Your Life
If you’re experiencing the effects of intimate partner violence, remember that you don’t have to navigate this alone. At Purple Sky Counseling, we specialize in helping survivors of IPV reconnect with their sense of self and heal from the trauma caused by abuse. Our compassionate team of therapists is here to support you every step of the way.
If you feel lost, confused, or disconnected from yourself, reach out to us today. Together, we can help you reclaim your life and move toward a future where you feel whole again.
Contact us now to schedule a consultation and start your journey to healing.
-Tara Bryne, LCSW
Licensed Clinical Social Worker and Mental Health Therapist in Heber City, Utah at Purple Sky Counseling